Even now, several days later, I'm astonished.
I loved shooting with that digital video camera.
Way too much.
Of course, my surroundings weren't bad.
Lake Arrowhead in the San Bernadino Mountains.
* * *
Tonight was a satisfying evening.
A walk down to the village. A cup of Starbucks coffee.
A quiet read.
Now that I think about it, I've been doing a lot of reading lately.
* * *
I spoke at length about my profession tonight.
So much that I felt like a recruiter officer.
But you can't blame me. Within moments of beginning a conversation with the person behind the counter, I knew I was talking to someone who should be a teacher.
Of course, she was unaware of her calling.
Anger clouded her vision of the future.
Disgust toward past teachers who saw her as a threat, instead of a challenge.
The only profession that won't bore her is the teaching profession.
I know this.
The only workspace that won't confine her is a classroom of bright students.
I know this too.
Because that's been my life.
I hope she figures out her calling soon. Because she's already a junior at UCLA, and she's only 18 years old.
My perspective might be biased -- I've been in love with teaching since the age of 20.
* * *
I'm making my way through all of Erich Segal's novels again.
They compel me.
His most powerful theme: the clash between faith and reality.
* * *
Herschel would have long heart-to-heart talks with Linc. He spoke of Berlin, Hitler's rise to power, the Nuremberg Lawsof 1935 depriving Jews of civil rights, and how he wished that, like his brother, he had seen the writing on the wall and left. But he and Hannah had been so comfortable, so seemingly assimilated, that they had never dreamed the Nazis wanted to get rid of them.
They both talked compulsively of the camps, of the cruel "Selections" that determined who would live or die. The Nazis only spared the lives of those who looked robust enough to work. After they described how they had lost their little daughter, Linc had nightmares for a week. He could not come to grips with hatred on so vast a scale.
Linc tried to understand their calamity in terms of the faith his grandma had instilled in him.
"Couldn't it maybe have been God's Will?" he asked them.
"His Will?" Herschel replied. "To slaughter all the members of our family?"
"No," the boy said with feeling, "that he spared you two--so we could meet."
Herschel looked at him with deep emotion. "Yes, even I could believe in such a God."
~ Doctors, Erich Segal, 1988
* * *
We all leave the place of our birth.
We all return home.
Our only dilemma?
Which road we choose.